Stop Child Trafficking Now Walk

This was such a great day! My mom, Melissa, Cynthia and I were the representatives walking from our friends and family. I was so blessed that they joined me and I know the more we all learn the more our hearts break for the innocent children enslaved in trafficking and prostitution in our own state.

After check-in we were welcomed and then had a few guest speakers, a representative from the Mayors office, a wonderful, passionate woman from Shared Hope International, Senator Wyden surprised the crowd. Apparently he is in campaign mode because there was a lot of yelling and promises to "crush" someone or something, I'm still not sure....but the best thing he said is that he was able to get $900,000 from the federal government to build a shelter/safe house for girls rescued from being trafficked. This is the most important thing that I have heard and read that is needed in Portland, so praise the Lord for this exciting news!! Melissa and I have decided we want to help in some way with the shelter....but what that looks like we are not sure yet, we will keep you posted:) But the greatest speaker was Jessica Richardson, who was introduced as a survivor of human trafficking, she made sure we understood that she was not merely a survivor but a conqueror! And there was wonderful music by a young man from Rwanda who lived through the Rwandan genocide and 6 years on the street post genocide. His music was beautiful, Enric Sifa is his name and I'm sure you could find him on the Internet and buy his c.d. Thanks so much to all who sponsored our team, we surpassed our goal and raise $430!!!

"He has shown you, O man, what is good and what the Lord requires of you, to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God." Micah 6:8

I will never forget the night I met Renu, I'll never forget her smile or the grace in which she told her story and I will never understand her capacity to forgive. When she was just 14 years old Renu was drugged by a family member and taken out of her home in Nepal and sold to a brothel in India. She literally woke up in captivity, her innocence brutally stolen, her story is one of pain, unimaginable horrors, rescue, love, and forgiveness. Someone dared to rescue Renu, they showed up in her nightmare and told her about a man named Jesus, she listened and fell in love and accepted Him as her Savior, but she was still a slave, her body used by 20 plus men a day. Outside she was dying yet her soul was renewed daily. Through miraculous circumstances Renu escaped and upon returning to her native Nepal she came face to face with the man who stole her childhood, her dreams, her future. She looked at this man and forgave him saying how could I, a sinner forgiven by Christ, not forgive him? Renu changed my life in many ways but perhaps most importantly she put a face on international human trafficking and sex slavery.
And then I read, Renting Lacey, which is about America's prostituted children and I associated a different face with child trafficking, my daughters. Maybe you were like me and did not think this could happen here in our country but the truth is at least 100,000 American juveniles are victimized through prostitution each year!! The book is horrifying in its true stories of girls that Linda has met with personally, stories so horrible you think they could not be true, but they are. I am haunted by what I have read, which is why I am sending you this email. Maybe you are like me and imagine that if you lived in times of slavery that you would have stood against it, I like to think that Angela Grimke and I would have been friends and fought slavery together. And maybe you cannot comprehend that just 50 years we still had legal segregation and again I imagine I would have walked with Dr. King, I would have boycotted and picketed, I would have stood on the lawn beyond the Lincoln Memorial and believed in a dream. And yet here we are, living in a time when, "more people are exploited in slavery today than were forcibly removed from Africa during 400 years of the trans-Atlantic slave trade. Worldwide the total market value of human trafficking is 32 Billion"-IJM
Why am I telling you all of this? This Saturday, October 2nd thousands of individuals in communities across the United States and Canada will participate in SCTNow Walks to raise funds and bring awareness to the issue of child trafficking. You can join my team, Worship Defined, and come walk with me in Portland or simply make a donation at:

http://sctnow.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.team&eventID=652&teamID=6166


I know in many ways this is just a small step, a small donation against huge statistics, but my Bible says to "seek justice" and this is a tangible way in which to do that.

Malia

"Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter-- when you see the naked, to clothe him." Is. 58:6,7

Zion

Today I laid a dream on the altar and walked away. Laying it down, I have learned, is not the same as giving up, there is a difference. I'm not giving up, I'm obeying. The gentle whisper that I love to hear told me what I didn't want to hear. He told me to let go, to let go of what I was sure He wanted for my family, of what over the past few months I thought He was confirming. But I know this voice and it is Him who I do everything for and so today I packed up the last bit tangible hope that I have been holding on to and said, not my will but Yours be done. I gave my dream to the Dream Giver, I gave my desire to the only One who can satisfy, my heart to my True Love. It is not the first time I have placed something so precious into these nail scarred hands and I'm sure it will not be the last. Sometimes I'm overwhelmed by the mystery when I wish i was just overwhelmed by Him. But my understanding isn't necessary, my obedience is. So Lord I give you my precious Zion because that is what You asked me to do.

Psalm 126

1When the LORD brought back the captive ones of Zion,
We were like those who dream.
2Then our mouth was filled with laughter
And our tongue with joyful shouting;
Then they said among the nations,
"The LORD has done great things for them."
3The LORD has done great things for us;
We are glad.
4Restore our captivity, O LORD,
As the streams in the South.
5Those who sow in tears shall reap with joyful shouting.
6He who goes to and fro weeping, carrying his bag of seed,
Shall indeed come again with a shout of joy, bringing his sheaves with him.

Today is my birthday. I'm getting old:) I'm finding myself in a place I never thought I'd be at this age. Ending His Way and our entire focus of life for the past 12 years, searching for a church family, coming home from 3 weeks in Africa, it's been an emotional year for us.
And I'm finding myself knowing that church has nothing to do with a building, when we were walking at the CF walk last Sunday beside the friends that we have come to love as family, I told Shane it was the best church service I have been to in a long time. And I'm finding myself thinking about children a world away, wondering what I can do, little me, to help them go to school, to give them a chance to change their lives and in turn change their country for the glory of God.
And here it is my birthday and today I received gifts from those who I love that have blessed me beyond words. My parents gave me a pair of pajamas, and then they gave me clothes and slippers to send to Korah for my girls, Bakuset and Mesret. Jer and Jen are giving to the Mocha Club in my honor. Shane and the kids are cleaning my car, praise God!! Terry and Cynthia gave me a gift from Hawaii, the place I so love. And then tonight, I went to dessert with my girlfriends and have to share what an incredible present they gave me. I opened the bag to find a beautiful picture of a 19 year old girl and a baby boy. I stared at it knowing they were from Africa and wondering what it was. Well when I turned it over I read this:

"Malia, When you returned home from Ethiopia, you brought with you the heart of Korah and a love for her people- and you have shared it with all of us. And now, that love has settled in all of our hearts as well and so our gift to you on this birthday is the sponsorship of Hiwot Dasalaw, a 19 year old girl living in Korah with her son, who will now have the opportunity to be sent to a technical school that will change her life forever. This is our simple way of showing our love for you by giving it to another....in your honor. Thank you for loving all people the way that Christ calls us to. And thank you for sharing that love with your friends! We love you!!"





Unbelievable! I'm speechless, thanks everyone, I love you!

You can sponsor a young adult from Korah for a one time gift of $600. That's all it takes to change a life forever!! If you want more info just let me know.

Oh how I miss Korah...

I need Africa more than Africa needs me

So I just joined The Mocha Club....I know I'm at least 5 years late on this one but Africa changes you. I saw this video right before I left and thought about ordering a shirt (I order a shirt from everywhere) but the phrase was not true for me...yet. But now it is and my shirt came in the mail today and tonight I joined the club. It is only $7 a month and you can join my "team" at:

http://mochaclub.org/joinme/worshipdefined (Apparently you must cut and paste this)

I chose to support child mothers and women at risk so I would love for you to join me as we recognize that we are not just waiting for the rescue that is to come, but that we are the rescue here and now. That when Jesus prayed, "Your kingdom come, Your will be done on earth as it is in Heaven" Lk. 11:2 we realize that it is not His will that young girls be kidnapped, brutalized, raped, child mothers, or forced to prostitute themselves to feed their families. That Isaiah 58 calls us to. "to loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo heavy burdens, to let the oppressed go free, and that you break every yoke? Is it not to share your bread with the hungry, and that you bring to your house the poor that are cast out; when you see the naked that you cover him..." I love this video because it is true that they have a joy that defies their circumstances, it does not make sense that they should love so deeply, give so freely, worship so lavishly and yet they do. But that does not mean that we should not fight their injustices, that we should not defend their cause. More than anything it should shame us that we don't live that way with all that we have. Yes, in Korah I saw God's glory everywhere despite the poverty but seeing His glory does not mean that it is ok to leave them in the oppression. "Now this was the sin of your sister Sodom: she and her daughters were arrogant, overfed, and unconcerned; they did not help the poor and needy"Ezek. 16:49 I left for Africa disillusioned, disappointed, disgusted all words beginning with dis:)at America and certainly the modern church. "Americans spend 705 billion dollars on entertainment and recreation a year, it would take only 65 billion to eliminate the most extreme poverty on the planet for more than a billion people." Stearns. But oddly enough I came home hopeful, because we have it!! God had blessed our nation with the ability to change the world. And don't you think that we will draw all men unto Him by loving our neighbor as ourselves? by acting justly and loving mercy and walking humbly with our God? That many will see these people who hug lepers, feed the widow, send children to school and want to know this Jesus that inspires people to give time, money, a voice to those who have been so heavily burdened? Imagine what the world would do if they saw that kind of love acted out?

Why are we still here?

The night that the reality of the situation hit me and I knew that my 11 day mission trip was turning out to be a 3 week mission trip I was praying in my creaky bunk bed before falling asleep asking God, why are we still here? What do you still have for us? His whisper filled my heart, you have seen the depravity, the depths of the need, the brokenness. Now I want you to see My Glory. I saw myself kneeling at His throne, not completely sure what it meant but fell asleep satisfied with His answer. I began to look for it, His glory. Before I saw the injustice, the despair, the image of Christ searching for food at a dump but then I then began to see. It was in the laughter of children playing games, in the sound of pepsi and fanta bottles clanking in cheers, it was in the firmness of Bakuset’s grip on my arm and the gentleness of Mesret’s hand in mine. It was in the way Fitsum looked at Tracey and the way Toni looked at Mahalet. It was in the sound of Pastor Anthony’s voice praising God in a language I did not understand, in Sammy feeding a leper who had no hands, letting him lick enjera off his own fingers. It was in the worship, songs sung with joy and dancing. It was in the eyes of a mother knowing that HIV would take her life and wanting to give her daughter a life she couldn’t give. It was in the eyes of the chosen parents as they tried to understand this kind of love. It was in the laughter over Laurie’s stories, keeping our hearts from breaking. It was in the men of Korah as they love these children, in Busy’s sincerity, in Mike’s gratefulness, in Mastwell’s smile. It was in the homes of Korah, they lacked running water, doors, windows, light, space, decorations…but there was no lack of His glory. It was in the way they welcomed us in, having us sit with them. It was in the strength of their will and the wetness of tears on my cheeks. It was in the jewelry shoved on my fingers, wrists, and even in my ears, the gifts from those who have nothing. And most of all it was in the words of Aster, as she attempted to comfort me, laying her hand on her chest and said, Jesus love. I thought poverty consumed Korah but I was wrong, it is the glory of God.

So very much to share and I promise it will come soon, but for now I am spending my time loving on my kids and catching up on my sleep. For now here is my last email and pics of the girls.

Korah. Last week I felt sorry for children living at the dump, today I love these children. Last week I walked through houses of strangers and was horrified that people had to live this way, today I walked into the homes of the girls who have braided my hair, taught me to count in their language, made me laugh, taught me games, and stolen my heart. Today it was personal. I sat on the bench next to meseret and cried, "Malia, no cry" her and aster said together. they also said this to me multiple times at church this morning. I was trying to hold it together, believe me. but how do you? when you have spent the last 10 days getting to know someone and somehow not computed that they too live in these unimaginable circumstances. I cried off and on through the homes of aster, senet, fruit, askala, habtume, betty, and more. As the girls were trying to comfort me and telling me not to cry, Aster looked at me and said, "Malia, no cry" she then put her hand on her chest and said "Jesus, love". can you imagine? but Aster is right. I then tried to explain "I'm crying because i love you" "I love you too." they said. today my heart is beyond broken and beyond full, I'm so glad a volcano erupted in Iceland and let be be in this moment...for such a time as this.


Me and Aster

Meseret, my girl and sweet Shwaye

Bakuset, who stole my heart the first day at the dump

Entebbe

We are here at the guest house. It's like a scene from a movie....dark and humid, we are all sitting at a long table with candles and a lantern as our only light. Our rooms are simple and clean and I will sleep my first night under a mosquito net, can't wait! We are enjoying this night of beauty before we leave these walls and go to our first orphanage tomorrow and see the little faces that have called us here.

Thank you Mrs. Bittner's 2nd grade class for your notes, we loved them! And girls I have not cheated and am only reading my notes on the days you told me to...i love them and you, thanks. Hopefully we will have wifi tomorrow and show you pictures of Alice's orphanage and Katie.

I miss you and love you.

Here is some links to where we are staying and going:

1st night http://www.tripadvisor.com/Hotel_Review-g298044-d816261-Reviews-Airport_Guesthouse_Entebbe-Entebbe.html

http://www.traveluganda.co.ug/entebbeairportguesthouse/index.html


2nd, 3rd night http://www.hostels.com/hostels/kichwamba/kingfisher-lodge-kichwamba/18840

4th night http://www.canaanchildrenshome.org/ youtube at canaans http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNU-W9dyfaw&NR=1

rest of time http://www.ethiopiaguesthome.com/home.html

Korah city dump we will be here for 1 day http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-

Journey to Africa

I have so much to say and have waited too long to say it...so here is my condensed version. As you can read by my last posts I my heart has been drawn to Uganda ever since I saw Invisible Children's Rough Cut a few years ago. The phrase, “Someday I’m going to go to Uganda”, has been heard coming out of my mouth many times over the past few years. In early January I felt the Lord tell me that I can go now, that someday is here. I was so excited I couldn't’t wait to tell Shane, and to my wonderful surprise he said ok let’s look into it. There were two things that I wanted to do, either meet the young boy we support through World Vision or visit Katie Davis of Amazima Ministries. On the morning of January 12th I spoke to World Vision about the process of going to meet Akileo and then as you know the night of January 12th we were glued to the tv and Internet watching the destruction in Haiti. It seemed maybe I was mistaken in going to Uganda. Haiti needed us - our prayers, our attention and our money. I put Uganda on the back burner and we focused on raising money for Haiti, which God in His goodness moved His people to give more than $3,000 at Worship for Haiti!!!

Then my friend, Jennifer, sent me an email saying, Malia I think you need to go on this trip. I clicked on the link and who do you think we are going to serve with in Uganda? Yep, Katie and Amazima Ministries!! I told Shane and he said I had to go, and I agreed. And now I am leaving tomorrow!!

My friend Cherrie is traveling with me from Portland and we are meeting up with our friend Toni in Amsterdam...along with 8 other people from across America that we have never met:) Sounds a little like our trip to Haiti.

My children are set with my wonderful friends taking turns picking them up from school and watching them until Shane is off work. I just spent the last hour writing them little notes for every night I'm gone...and I bought them each a disposable camera to take pictures while I'm gone so I don't miss a thing. $20 bucks says Hope's is done in a day:) I will miss them so very much but I know Shane will do a great job and they will have so much fun with their many play dates.

So last Friday Shane, Rick, Cherrie, and my parents and I filled up the "totes" we are bringing to the orphanages, dump, Amazima, and other ministries that we will be visiting. Thanks to Cherrie, aka the shoe lady, and my wonderful friends and family we loaded up 250 lbs of shoes, medicine, underwear, food, and more shoes. It is a good thing Shane was there, as he is "spacial", he loaded the tubs to perfect weight to be let aboard the airplane.








Thank you my wonderful friends for taking care of my kids while I'm gone, I love you.




and to the two that created this monster:) I love you,



I love you Shane,

and Maris,



and Kruse,


and Hope.


Here is out itinerary:


Day 1 Arrive in Entebbe, and check into the Entebbe Airport Guest Home
for one night.

Day 2 Breakfast at the guest home and pick up by Canaan’s Children
Home bus by 9 AM and proceed to My Father’s House orphanage to
drop off donations. Head to Jinja. Check into the King Fisher and
eat lunch. Work at a small orphanage of 25 kids run by Alice. until 4
PM. Enjoy a boat ride to the source of the Nile. In the evening, a
few team members should help Katie Davis with setting up the food
and anything else she needs for the feeding program on Saturday.
Day 3 Join Katie by 9:30 AM for the feeding program all day. Pick up at 4
PM. Dinner at King Fisher Lodge.
Day 4 Check out of the King Fisher Lodge. Church with Pastor Isaac and
day with the children. Stay at Canaan’s Children Home.
Day 5 Spend the day with the Canaan Children’s Home children.
Day 6 Breakfast and good-byes at Canaan’s. Head to Kampala. Lunch at
the mall (exchange money at the bank) and shopping at the market.
Arrive at the airport by 3:30 PM or 4 and head to Ethiopia.
Day 7 Arrive around noon in Addis. Check into the Ethiopia Guest Home
and eat a late lunch. Proceed to the impoverished Bole Bulbula area
of Addis to work with the children. Dinner out at a restaurant of
choice.
Day 8 Mother Theresa HIV orphanage and AHope HIV Orphanage. Dinner
at the EGH.
Day 9 The new AWA Transitional Home to paint mural and Kids Kare
orphanage. Dinner out at the Traditional Ethiopian Resturant
Day 10 Korah city dump to work with kids. Dinner at the EGH.
Day 11 Shop in the morning. Work with the Dahley Community Project
ministry. Head back to EGH for clean up, packing and dinner. Leave
for airport for check in by 7:00 PM. Flight at 10:50 PM

Will post pictures when we have internet...

Isn't this pendant beautiful?! You can buy it and others like it at: http://www.etsy.com/shop/junkposse

With this pendant specifically $25 is donated to Habitat for Haiti....well go get one!

Speechless

It's not often that I am speechless, but today I was. Jacob was all that I wanted him to be and more. I still can't believe that I met him today. When he was done speaking Cherrie and I went to meet him and when we were about ten feet away I stopped walking and told Cherrie that I couldn't talk, how do you even begin to try to explain to someone, whom you have never met, that they have completely changed your life. That because of them you will never be the same. How do you say that without sounding like a crazy stalker? She said "Malia, you have to talk to him!!" and literally pulled me a few steps toward him. He was so sweet and talked to us for quite a while and we hugged, twice:). We then got to have lunch with him and the roadies and had a question and answer session. So pretty much it was, as my niece says, "the greatest day ever!" I'm pretty sure my smile says it all...

SHUT UP!!!

I'm freaking out right now...freaking out!! So my love for Uganda all started the night I watched Invisible Children a few years ago. Specifically with a young boy named Jacob on the film. At any moment on any day I can hear Jacob crying, literally I can close my eyes and hear the sound of a sorrow I have ever heard in my life. He was told not to cry by the LRA and in this moment while being filmed he breaks down and I promise you if you watch it you will never be the same. Jacob is Uganda to me. And now here I am, less than a month to travel, and I'm thinking about Jacob so naturally I go to Invisible Children's website to see what is new and they have a new Legacy Tour. It says, "10 Stories transformed by war. 10 Advocates for peace. 10 Tours across America" So I click on NW and who do you think is on our tour!?!?!? Are you freaking kidding me, Jacob. Jacob is on our tour, Jacob is going to be at George Fox University on Wednesday, this Wednesday, I am going to see Jacob on Wednesday, 3 weeks before I go to Uganda I am meeting Jacob. Shut up!

This is a brief history of Invisible Children and you can meet Jacob here:



This has a little more of Jacob...



I am so very excited to meet Jacob, but the reality is Joseph Kony is still out there. Jacob has been rescued but there are tens of thousands of children still in Uganda being kidnapped, forced to kill, raped, maimed, and murdered by the LRA and we cannot sit here and pretend that it is not happening...

God gave me an analogy that has helped me so much. I was thinking about the parable of the talents:

"Again, the Kingdom of Heaven can be illustrated by the story of a man going on a trip. He called together his servants and gave them money to invest for him while he was gone. He gave five bags of gold to one, two bags of gold to another, and one bag of gold to the last--dividing it in proportion to their abilities--and then left on his trip. The servant who received the five bags of gold began immediately to invest the money and soon doubled it. The servant with two bags of gold also went right to work and doubled the money. But the servant who received the one bag of gold dug a hole in the ground and hid the master's money for safekeeping."After a long time their master returned from his trip and called them to give an account of how they had used his money. The servant to whom he had entrusted the five bags of gold said, `Sir, you gave me five bags of gold to invest, and I have doubled the amount.' The master was full of praise. `Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let's celebrate together!'...."Then the servant with the one bag of gold came and said, `Sir, I know you are a hard man, harvesting crops you didn't plant and gathering crops you didn't cultivate. I was afraid I would lose your money, so I hid it in the earth and here it is.' "But the master replied, `You wicked and lazy servant! You think I'm a hard man, do you, harvesting crops I didn't plant and gathering crops I didn't cultivate? Well, you should at least have put my money into the bank so I could have some interest. Take the money from this servant and give it to the one with the ten bags of gold. To those who use well what they are given, even more will be given, and they will have an abundance. But from those who are unfaithful, even what little they have will be taken away.

So I was thinking about being an American and why I have been born into a country of such wealth. Why me? What did I do to deserve this? Just because of where I was born I have countless opportunities and basic necessities, clean water, food, safety, etc. And then I started thinking about this parable and how living in America is like a talent. What am I going to do with this talent? Am I going to bury it? Live in suburbia ignoring the pain and suffering and disease that is rampant throughout the world? Ignoring the fact that over 26,000 children die a day due to preventable causes? Or am I going to invest this talent? Am I going to choose to invest in organizations helping the poor, to not live by the world's standards of accumulation of stuff but to give as I have been given? I do not have this figured out but I am ready to say ok Lord this is Your money and I am no longer going to spend unwisely on me and my family, we want to invest in Your Kingdom on earth, right now.

"We can be the generation that no longer accepts that an accident of latitude determines whether a child lives or dies- but will we be that generation? Will we in the West realize our potential or will we sleep in the comfort of our affluence with apathy and indifference murmuring softly in our ears? Fifteen thousand people dying needlessly every day from Aids, TB, and malaria. Mothers, fathers, teachers, farmers, nurses, mechanics, children. This is Africa's crisis. That it's not on the nightly news, that we do not treat this as an emergency- that's our crisis.
Future generations flipping through these pages will know whether we answered the key question. The evidence will be the world around them. History will be our judge, but what's written will be up to us. We can't say our generation didn't know how to do it. We can't say our generation couldn't afford it. And we can't say our generation didn't have reason to do it. It's up to us."-Bono


Found this Pastor from Katie at Amazima and then my friend Jen just put this on her blog, had to share. I have listened to the first 3 sermons, they are amazing, convicting, inspiring, life changing. What I love about this man is that he is not claiming to have every answer. He speaks from a place of personal conviction, he is vulnerable and real. He brings the conviction of our hearts and what God has been moving us towards into this series that leaves us in a place of choice. And the series is overloaded with scripture, I love it!!

Dance Party!!!

So Shane went out for dinner tonight with his friend, so it was just me and the kids for dinner...we had great harvest bread. Yeah, that's it. There was no fruit, no vegetable, no protein, we decided to go straight carbs and fat. Fresh apple crunch bread toasted and dripping in butter, nice! Hope and I were done after two pieces while the other two just kept eating. So Hope says, "Mom can we listen to Whitney Houston?" Ummm heck yes we can. Normally we have to wait until after dinner to have music because everyone sings along even while their mouths are full and this leads to food spewing across the table and such. So Hope and I decided to serenade the other two. As you can see below we are just getting to the good part!






And then Nani had to join in the dancing...




No dance party is complete without a little Jackson 5 and Blame it on the Boogie!! Jennyth, Kruse wanted to make sure you saw his moon walk:)



I like to take things to the next level, as you can see. Look at Kruse looking at me, the embarrassment will continue my son. Seriously, there is a reason I can't sing. I would be the crazy old lady trying out for American Idol for 7 straight seasons! HA!! My eyes are closed!! Like in that Hugh Grant movie...About a Boy.



break dancing



Incidentally the night ended in tears as Hope said, Mom take a picture of me jumping off the chair! To which I promptly replied, OK!!!! Yeah, then Kruse walked by right as she jumped and she landed on him, it was then the "worst night ever" and our party was over...

Mother Teresa HIV Orphanage

It is less than a month now until I go to Africa. So many emotions, so much anticipation. Tonight as i was praying about going to Mother Teresa's Orphanage I was overwhelmed at the thought.

"Such a beautiful day . . . to meet Christ face to face in the poor. He was there -- the hungry, the sick, the naked Christ -- and the thought of Him in this distressing disguise gave me great joy, peace and strength. The greatest disease is not TB or leprosy, but the feeling of being uncared for, unwanted, deserted by everyone. The greatest disease is the lack of love. The unwanted are hungry -- not for food -- but for love. They are thirsty, not just for water, but for peace. They are homeless, not just for shelter, but for understanding. Be the living expression of kindness -- kindness in your face, your eyes, your kind greeting. Let no one go away from you without being better and happier." -Mother Teresa.

We will spend only one day at this orphanage, one day...is it long enough to change anything? to love a child for a day, it seems impossible to imagine. I don't want to be a tourist to despair, to walk through and pity, I want to...what? I don't know, change it all, bring them home, heal them, but none of this is in my power...Christ in His most distressing disguise...in the emaciated child, the innocent born with a death sentence, the children living with HIV.

Sometimes I don't know why I am going to Africa, really what is the point of an 11 day trip, am I changing anything? I have moments that I am so excited to go and then I think why am I excited to see poverty like i have never known, to walk into orphanages where children will never leave to a forever family, to witness the innocent living in dumps, is this really something to be excited about? Its an odd place to be, but I am excited. I don't really have a lot of gifts...I make the best chocolate chip cookies ever and I can talk for hours, that's pretty much all I got...except love. I can love, especially a child. I know that I will fall in love with every child I see, with every pair of dark eyes staring at me. I guess right now that is my plan for this orphanage, to love the way God created me to. To see the child behind the sickness, to find the joy beyond the circumstance, to see God's sovereignty in their reality. To make a child smile, if only for a day, to let them know a mother's touch, kiss, hug and pray that it will be enough.

Jen, this is for you

This could be you and me!!



The dock




The Beach



The boat

I cried myself to sleep last night asking the question, how am I supposed to live in this world? I recently started reading Linda Smith's first book, "From Congress to the Brothel" which is describing the horrors of India's sex trade, children forced to have sex with 20 to 40 men a day. This is not new information, I have met Renu, heard her story, I read "Sold" last summer and "Renting Lacy", but reading this yesterday and then watching the 20/20 my friend sent me last night about child sacrifices in Uganda I just don't know how to live in this world. Falling asleep in my safe home crying for the children that I don't know how to save, for the mother whose child was decapitated for "good luck", for the hungry, the thirsty, the displaced, for the women who are shunned because of fistula which has been eradicated in the US over a hundred years, for the hopeless, the lonely. I'm overwhelmed and horrified and completely at a loss of how to change anything. All i know is I'm tired of this American dream, I'm tired of being so comfortable while the rest of the world is in pain. I don't know what any of it means but I know I can't just live this life the way I have. I am so excited for my trip to Africa, maybe there is an answer there, something to pour our hearts into, our time, our money. I don't know the answer but I hope God shows us soon....

Haiti

We are heavy hearted tonight. Found out that Pastor Lavaud is in the Dominican Republic looking for food...we are overwhelmed by the destruction in Haiti and the lack of basic necessities. We are sending him money and researching how to get him food, if anyone wants to help just let me know. Most of all please do not forget about Haiti and the incredible people who live there and the battle they are fighting just to survive. They need our prayers and they need our help.

Praying for Haiti

We have heard that Pastor Lavaud and family are safe tonight. There was little damage in Hinche. I have emailed A New Arrival to find out about Rock and the orphanage. Praying tonight for the homeland of our daughter, for the beautiful people we met there, and the children....not a lot of words.

Adoption

It seems like it is all around us these past few months!! Most recently with Miss Meili coming home followed shortly after by Miss Zuri and Miss Zinea, the beautiful faces of God's promise. How incredible to see them, to touch them, to hear their laughter. When Meili giggled the other night, be still my heart, I soooo loved the sound.

All this adoption had got me thinking...from Worship for Orphans, to Orphan Sunday, then Voices, and the coming home of my friends sweet daughters, and of course Hope's referral anniversary and then on December 20th her adoptions day. 4 years ago I saw my girl for the first time in the Miami airport, quiet, shy, covered in scabies, and patches of dry hair on her head...and now she is loud, silly, joyful, has glowing skin, and for the first time can tuck her hair behind her ears...she is so very excited about that. Anyways it got me thinking about adoption and what it is and most of all what it is NOT. It is NOT a mission, it is NOT saving a child, it is NOT a cause. Adoption is how God builds families. I know I have told our call to Hope many times but maybe what I have not told is what God did NOT say. He did NOT say Malia did you know that Haiti is the poorest country in the western hemisphere? It is the 4th hungriest country in the world? Did you know that Haiti has the highest rates of infant, under-five and maternal mortality in the Western hemisphere. Diarrhoea, respiratory infections, malaria, tuberculosis and HIV/AIDS are the leading causes of death? He said none of these things that night in October of 2001, no He said, Malia you have a daughter in Haiti. He planted a seed of adoption in my heart and over the next three years He watered it until Hope grew. I do not believe that Gods plan for the world would leave children as orphans, that war, famine, and disease would rob children of their parents. That mothers would be put in a position to place their children up for adoption because they could not afford to feed them, this is the reality of a fallen world, but Psalm 68:6 says, “God sets the lonely in families”. I believe that in His sovereignty God knew that Emilia would not be able to keep Hope and so He placed her in my heart, to grow as my child and in His perfect way and in His perfect timing He brought Hope home to her forever family. That is adoption. I say this because at the Orphan Sunday event something happened that only fueled my fire that i need to make this clear, please do not get me wrong, it was for all intents and purposes a great success and I love Steven Curtis Chapman and have NO doubt in my mind that God is using him mightily to aid the cause of orphans. Ok that being said here is what happened, in the beginning of the show they had all these pictures of children and a challenge of sorts to help the fatherless and orphan and that a way to do that would be by adoption, it was proposed in such a way to meet a need, not answer a call. My dad always says as Christians we don't meet needs, we answer His call. I'm sitting there thinking in my head that I might have said it differently when I glanced down at my daughters sitting next to each other and I watched Damaris look at Hope in a way that I had never seen her look, and quite frankly never want to see again. As she sat and listened and saw pictures of waiting children she put her hand on Hope and looked at her with a look of sympathy, she looked at her like she was an orphan.

Damaris has always looked at Hope as her sister, yes she knows Hope's birth situation, she knows she was in an orphanage, she knows that she was born in a third world country, but she has always known that Hope is her sister, that God placed her in our family, we were not adopting to do our part in saving the world, we were obeying our Lord when He said go get your daughter.

I think what really gets me upset about this is thinking that Hope might one day think that she was adopted because I was trying to do good, to save her. The thought of that hurts me and scares me and so I will continue to tell her daily that I love her, just as Jesus tells me daily that He loves me. He adopted me because I grew in His heart and He brought me into His forever family. He never felt sorry for me or pitied me, He simply loved me as His own....amazing.

I was reading a blog the other night and a mom has two adopted sons from Ethiopia and is faced with the question by many, why Ethiopia, why not America, why not this or that? Jen and I talked about this with Meili when someone asked her why China? my answer to all the questions, why Haiti, why Ethiopia? why China? why Uganda? why domestic? because that is where our children are. Because God builds families through adoption and He knows our children while they were in their mothers womb, whether my womb or Emilia's He knew them, the plan for their lives, the parents and the siblings they would have.

Life is back to normal, Damaris looks at Hope like her pesky little sister once again, but it was a good reminder for me as an adoptive mom to not let anyone else label my girl, to continue to remind all of my children of God's sovereignty, His plan, our spiritual adoption stories.

What does this mean for the orphan? Because they are out there, an estimated 143 million of them. If adoption is a call to build families but not necessarily for everyone then what do we do with James 1:27, "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." Adoption is not for everyone but caring for the orphan is. God is calling His church to respond, not the church as an institution, the people that make up the church. He is calling us.

143 million. I want to ask you to imagine these children but I know that that is impossible, it is truly beyond our comprehension to do so….so then what do we do with a number so great. A number that numbs our senses, that removes the faces, names and stories of the children it represents. How do we fight a statistic that we can’t wrap our head around? We give the statistic a face, we find out their story, and we call them by name. Personally, the way that our family looks after the orphan in distress is through World Vision sponsorship and gift catalog, through Samaritan's Purse shoebox program, and supporting missionaries. There are so many organizations in so many countries that we have no excuse but to do something no matter how small it may seem.

My Temporary Home

It’s funny how the biggest blessings in our lives can sometimes not seem like blessings at all. It is winter, my least favorite season living in my temporary home. Building a fire everyday is NOT fun, just in case you ever wondered, it’s really not. It’s not fun when your husband hurts his ankle and can no longer push the wheelbarrow to the wood pile in the barn and fill it with the various kinds of wood needed to build and sustain fire (It’s also not fun because he is in pain and can’t play soccer or basketball and coach and what not, but this is about me:). I’m not really a fan of this, but this house is my blessing. If I did not live in this house we could not have all gone to Hawaii earlier this year, we could not go to Haiti this summer, I would not own my lovely Land Rover, or be able to support World Vision the way that we are able to, and most of all my kids would not attend the school that they attend. I had prayed and asked the Lord to help us send our kids to private school, I did not specify any conditions such as living in a home whose primary source of heat is a woodstove, and so this temporary and unusual situation is really an answered prayer….isn’t that funny? I love my children and I love what they receive from their school. I love that they are receiving a Christian education and I love that they have teachers who truly love them and pray for them but most of all I love their friends. Friendship is one of God’s greatest gifts….ha!! I sound like a greeting card. But it is true, I love the friends that God has placed in the lives of my children. And the funny thing about this blessing, that I sometimes think is a curse of a house, is that God has blessed us, Shane and I, with incredible friendships. Every Thursday this summer 5 families from the school would come over and play sand volleyball until it is too dark to see, and then we move to our backyard and have dinner together and laugh and talk and eat and have a great time. I mean really who has a sand volleyball court in their front yard? Who would have thought that God would use this house to bring me and my kids friends. I was thinking about my girlfriends and how great and different they all are and how we all complement each other and have different strengths and weaknesses and what a gift they are and how blessed I am to live in this temporary home. We were supposed to be here one year, and here we are 3 and a half years later. Thank You Lord, for humbling me here, blessing me here, letting my girl scout roots be used here, for reminding me to look at my life through Your eyes and to see the blessings in what I think is the curse. And thank You that oak will last all night long if I pull the dampers out and use my tetris skills to load up the fireplace, I really love that!!